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What Happens When Your Aging Parent Gets Angry at You for Helping?

Wasn’t that a kick in the teeth? You still can’t believe it. Your mother or father, who happen to be in their 70s or 80s, for example, had been struggling with certain things. You didn’t consider yourself a caregiver, especially when you first offered assistance. You lived not too far away and it made sense to just go and help take out the garbage or get something up from the basement. It was no big deal at first.

Caregiver Stress in Spring Branch TX: When A Parent Is Angry At You

Caregiver Stress in Spring Branch TX: When A Parent Is Angry At You

Then things changed.

They started calling on you more and more frequently. You accommodated them, mostly because you would’ve felt guilty if you said no and something happened. You know they’re not getting any younger, they’re getting weaker, and their health is declining slowly. How could you possibly say no?

After a while, though, you started to fall into a routine.

You began helping with laundry, cleaning, cooking, shopping, and so on. Eventually, though, as it was taking a toll on your personal time and life, you were getting worn out. Every time you stopped over at the house you basically took things over on your own and actually started dictating what they should do, where they should put things, that they should avoid going certain places, and so on.

Then just earlier today or perhaps yesterday they got angry at you.

You were just helping. How dare they get angry with you after all you had done for them! You feel indignant, offended, and angry. Don’t they realize the sacrifice you’ve been making? Don’t they understand just how much stress and anxiety and pressure taking care of them and helping out has placed on you?

One thing that’s important to understand is they may have been trying to get your attention for a while. Many family caregivers begin taking control of situations and even try to dictate what their elderly parents or even a spouse should or shouldn’t do. Eventually those recommendations seem to become orders.

If you find the tension between you and an aging parent growing, if you feel as though stress and pressure are building in your life because you’re a family caregiver, it’s time to step back and think about other options. You may need help.

Home care aides can provide the assistance families and seniors need to not just make sure those elderly men and women are safe at home, but have the right support, encouragement, and the best relationship with those who matter most to them.

If you’ve gotten angry with an aging parent or they’ve gotten angry with you, all because you were just trying to help, it may be time to step back and consider home care support.

If you or an aging loved one are considering home care to reduce caregiver stress in Spring Branch, TX, please call the caring staff at At Your Side Home Care. We will answer all of your senior care questions. Call today: (832) 271-1600.

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Donna Wrabel

For most of us, the word "home" evokes warm feelings of comfort, security and well-being. For older adults, home also means holding tight to cherished memories and maintaining self-esteem and independence. When illness, injury or age make life a little more challenging, remaining at home in a comfortable, familiar environment encourages recovery and enhances the quality of life. Home can be defined as a private residence, an independent or assisted living facility or even a short term stay in the hospital, we recognize the additional benefits provided by a personal, professional assistant.

Our Certified Nurse Aides, 24-Hour Live-in Assistants and Home Health Aides are available 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. We also provide the security and confidence of 24-hour Telephone Assistance, so fast, reliable help is always available when it's needed. To learn more about our homecare services see our homecare services page.

Different people need different levels of homecare. To meet the requirements of our clients, At Your Side Homecare maintains consistent staffing levels of caring professionals. Homecare service is available for as little as a few hours a week, or as many as 24 hours a day, seven days a week

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